Good boundaries are an act of love
I have fantastically strong boundaries. I’ve been building and strengthening my boundaries since I was a kid. Back then I had a lot of spirit help with them. I love my boundaries and couldn’t imagine trying to get through life without them. Not everybody has good boundaries. Sometimes you don’t even realize that you need them. ( you always need them)
We are currently dealing with some toxic people. Things have been a little crazy the last few days. I’ve had to watch a loving strong family take a sucker punch to the gut.
This is something that I knew would probably happen (though it's worse that I thought it would get) and at the same time could do little about it until the people involved were ready to be helped. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.
Things in this situation have finally reached the point that everyone is awake to what is going on and ready to do the work that needs doing. It has taken years, but even though it all totally sucks ass, I’m so glad this moment is finally here.
I know big changes and transformations are messy and destructive. Old things have to be torn down, so new things can be built. It can be hard to think about that when things are going to shit around you. You don’t need someone telling you to look on the bright side or some other condescending bullshit that invalidates what you are feeling and experiencing. It doesn’t help heal things.
The problem we are currently dealing with has two parts, the toxic people and the toxic environment they created.
The people have been removed from our physical space. I’ve been doing some binding work on them to help keep them from continuing to do harm. I may have to do something more, but I’m waiting to see how things go.
The house and land is going to take some serious work. They’ve taken a home that was once welcoming and filled with love and turned it into a oppressive black hole of suck. I spend maybe five minutes in for the first time in over a year and it was awful. Walking through the front door was like stepping through a thick curtain of oily muck and the space felt all shrinky like the walls and ceiling were pressing down on me.
The people currently living there have been burning sage (so much that it burned my nose and coated my tongue and I had to get outside) and saying affirmations. They are Peace and Love Hippies. They are doing what they can to bring the house back to the home it once was. Unfortunately, I’m going to have to tell them it isn’t enough.
Physically and energetically everything in the house needs cleaned, aggressively cleaned. There are things that need to be forced out and local spirits to be appeased.
It will be the most difficult working I’ve done. I haven’t planned out exactly what I’m going to do yet. I need to talk with the people living in the house and create a plan.
Most of what is going on right now could’ve been avoided if the people involved would’ve set good boundaries. Many people avoid setting good boundaries because they either don’t know how or think that boundaries are mean.
The family that I’ll be working with is very open and loving. They welcome everyone in. It is wonderful, but it also leaves a lot of space for harmful people to work. They don’t need to stop being open and loving to have boundaries.
Good boundaries aren’t about being an asshole to people. Good boundaries are about loving yourself, your family, creating sacred space and taking good care of those around you. Even the toxic people.